What a Week....

I had the worst week of my life last week -- a deer came barrelling down our court from a steep hill to the side of our neighbors' house, and instead of hitting the deer (NOTE: HIT THE DEER, it's only a comp claim on your insurance), I swerved and hit the neighbor's BMW. 15 MPH is still HARD....cars definitely Are Hurt, airbags off, the whole thang. Sigh. And the neighbor's not Mr. Nice either -- turns out, too, that day he had found out he has prostate cancer, which is now my fault of course.

Next day, my James dropped my notebook computer (which is my life) -- frying the motherboard -- so now the screen and wireless card don't work. (Thank goodness for Dell In-Home Tech Support.)

Then finally, I decided to up my rates in my law practice (to try to give me a little bandwidth to have more time for my fEmpowerment biz) and my biggest (e.g., "pays the mortgage") client said "nope." (We're talking a small raise, when I haven't raised the rates in 4 years.) Yikes. So I blew that all away last night at S-Factor pole dancing -- and releasing my "Inner Bond Grrl" to come and just take me away!

Away with you, bad energy! Away! Away!

I am behind on reading posts -- I see that Mica has like 4 that she's made in the last week and I haven't even been able to read them. (Of course, not being able to use my notebook at a cafe, etc. -- having to be wired to Life Support here at home makes it a little harder (smile).) Gotta catch back up.

I spoke with a very wise woman -- Susan Bird, who is one of my trainers at fEmpowerment. One GOOD thing that happened last week is that spurious ("unfounded") lawsuit against me settled -- yes, they got some of my $, but the deal basically is that if you go to court, it will cost you BANK in lawyer fees, agony, etc. -- and you might LOSE. So -- pay, go, and blow it out of your energy field, that's basically what my lawyer said.

But this has been going on nearly two YEARS. and what Susan said to me is that the problem is when you "obsess" about stuff that is NOT joyful/good energy, you "magnetize" things to you that "match" the energy you are giving off. (I have talked about this in a previous post.) So, tho the lawsuit settled, the problem was, with that out of the way, all the "crap energy" I have been generating against the guy suing me, against the system, fear, etc. (hard not to) "pulled in" stuff that was equally "bad energy." Hence -- once that lawsuit was over, BANG I get hit by some SERIOUS crap bang-bang-bang.

Susan said that this was The Universe/God/The Big "Is" showing me that this is what it's all about -- magnetism. You Get What You Think. You Get What You FEEEEEEL. If you are FEELING angry, fearful, vengeful, etc. -- you're drawing that to you like a magnet. You become a "tuning fork" for that energy. As a kid, did you ever do that science experiment with "tuning forks"? That if you start one going and have a few next to it, if one is the same "tone," it will just start resonating too, even tho you never touched it? That's what this is all about -- illustrated graphically. If you are "resonating" on revenge, or what you're going to "do to her" who "did to you," or you are with a James who is keeping you in fear or keeping you in a stomach knot, this is all I have to say to you. I am living proof, Grrrrrls. You are drawing to you other things "attuned" to that same energy you are giving off. So when that James is out of your life, or you stop being vengeful, IT WILL NOT STOP. You have put that stuff in the pipeline, and you're going to reap the "benefits" of your energy for a while until it clears OUT.

I am no New-Age, Woo-Woo Grrl. But let me tell you. I just had this graphically demonstrated to me.

So what's it mean to you? Set aside that time I said a long time ago -- even if it's 10 minutes a day -- and concentrate on "Kittens and Puppies." Get yourself to FEEEEEL great! Do that Inner Visioning of you in your Gorgeous Bond Grrl life. Don't cut it back! Dream Dream Dream -- Go! If you don't put yourself in this place EVERY SINGLE DAY, at least part of the day, and your day is made up of Go Go, Frustration, Hit My Head On The Wall, Pissed Off, Get The Kids, Hate My Boss-ness, well Grrl, that's what you will GET MORE OF. Sorry, but it's true. You get what you "resonate" and that is a FACT that I have just learned.

Let me give you one more tidbit of this. Susan worked with me on Monday. She does hypnotherapy -- in fact, she does CDs, where she finds out where you feel you would like to "go" in a hypnosis -- e.g., beach, desert, mountain, etc.), and what you want to "work on," and then she does it for you so you have it for your "time" each day -- personalized to you (let me know if you want her number (smile). She works with you to just raise that energy, so you're "resonating," at least for that period you're listening to that CD (and it should be EVERY day -- she can make them so you can do it in the car e.g. don't have to be lying down, or if you want, to do at home/quiet) -- for that period, you are "resonating" your inner Bond grrl, your awesome life, etc. You "break" the "chain" of the Bads. So we worked on me on Monday, and I absolutely no joke thought "this is not going to work" BUT -- while doing it -- I concentrated on feeling that it WILL WORK. (That "be in the Now, give up the How.")

So what did I find in my email this morning? That client that said You Are Cut Off No More...sent me 2 contracts to review. I had given up my fear of that yesterday specifically -- because I almost have my house rented out, etc. and I was thinking "you know, heck, this will give me more time for the fEmpowerment biz...if I don't have the mortgage, etc. I will have more time, and don't "need so much" $." Let it go and....in it comes. Weird, huh?

I am also driving a friend's car, while mine is getting fixed. It's a beater, and really slow. And a stick shift. You know what it's making me do? SLOW DOWN. (Driving this car at 55 is like taking my life in my hands (laugh) -- but it's free, no rental fee!) In my big car that my James got me, it's an SUV (yeah don't bust my chops on the gas guzzler bit -- it had to fit my dog and my massage table for going offsite to clients), and I can go like 80 and still be filing my nails, talking on the phone, daydreaming.....ok that is not good. This is bringing me back into Focus.

Last thing. Have you read Gayle Sheehy's new book? (I think that's her name.) She wrote "Passages." Another grrlfriend is reading it, and if you are in your sort of 40s range, it's a MUST. I have to get it. She was reading parts of it to me last night -- she's on the part about Passion Parties (which of course I do, as part of the fEmpowerment classes -- in fact I have one coming up on Friday). It's a book about women and sex -- and taking that area into your own hands, grrls.

Which, of course, is all about what being a Bond Grrl is all about!

Late'ah -- hopefully next week I will have enough time to Catch Up!

Solitaire, Resonating Madly On The Higher Good