Be civil! Try it -- you'll like it.

Be civil…

You know, one thing came up the other day, in therapy – yes, my James and I go to therapy fortnightly. (As Sark once said, “I will never have another unsupervised relationship.”) One of the things that came up is how “nice” we are to one another – as in, saying “Thank you” and “Your welcome” to one another when something comes up. In this instance, it was one of us trying to remember something that had happened the week before – when a little memory trigger came up, we said “Oh! Right! Thank you!”

Our therapist said that it was so refreshing in “this day and age” that a couple that’s been together for 6 years would be “actually civil” to one another. This got me to thinking.

Today, we’ve been driving around Austin TX. I’m driving, my James is navigating – because he’s using a program on the computer, and it’s just too touchy for me to do it (I’d rather be the one DOING the U-turn than the one saying “oh, dear, um, U-turn…”) We got quite lost there for a while, but the thing is, we BOTH stay very civil. “Oh, my mistake…!” “Oh, oh I’m sorry, I thought that we needed to go left…” (when the navigator HAD said “go left”).

Civility. When was the last time you really thought about it? I think if you were to drive in a car with my James and I, you would think we were out of some 1940s movie. And you know what? I really REALLY like that.

We don’t actually get angry “at each other” – we figure out how to get out of the jam. We each are gentle. And we say a lot of “Oh, my bad” or “Oh, don’t worry” or “No worries,” or “Oh! Thank you!” Yes, we really do say all that. Even after 6 years.

I think that this might be a nice little homework assignment. How’s about a little civility towards your James tonight? And I’m not saying that you do it because HE is going to do it. I say, pretend that you’re in a 1940s movie. Kinda sassy, but very civil. Raise the bar. I dare you.